In Another World and a Different Life
by silentwriter27
Summary: Dara a Dragonage junkie who recently lost her wife under tragic circumstances, deals with her grief by going on long Dragonage binges. She finds her world turned upside down when she wakes after falling asleep during one such binge to find herself in Thedas. A little drabble of fluff and love found again between two women who have dealt with the hard realities of deep loss.


She wasn't this person. Clad in reflective metal surfaces. So far away from home. Her soft body honed and hardened through days and months spent drilling with the Right and Left Hands of the Divine. A piece of charcoal, a pencil, a paintbrush felt more comfortable in her hand than a blade.

She was a creator, not a killer.

The cold, drafty halls of Skyhold were beginning to bite at her. Nag at her. Other than the wedding bands strung around her neck, Leliana had been her true comfort in this place. Her gentle voice, rare smile, and even rarer laugh like a balm on the tattered edges of her heart.

" _You fool. You're here for a few months and you think you can hold your own in a real battle? Battling a few demons near a breach is different from sliding your blade through what was once a good man's belly."_

Venom had dripped from every syllable Leliana's lovely lips formed and forced out each between clenched teeth. That was four days ago. The Spymaster hadn't spoken to her since.

Dara squeezed her eyes shut and took a deep trembling breath as she pushed the heavy wooden chamber door open. Stepping across the threshold, the leather bundle holding her precious drawings tucked under her arm, she quickly closed the door behind her. Releasing her breath, she pressed her back against the wood in an attempt to steady her racing heart. After a moment, she righted herself and stepped tiredly across the room.

A fire had already been lit in the brazier bathing the small table in the middle of the room in warm light and casting the farthest corners of the chamber in velvety shadows. Dara gently placed her leather bundle on the table, untying it with deft fingers and pulling out the day's drawings. Sera, wild and silly and fierce, laughing on the roof of the Herald's Rest. Iron Bull, feet squared and battle axe propped across broad shoulders. Josephine, elegant, quill to her lips, smiling at some personal letter on her desk, a rare reprieve. Leliana, arm gracefully extended as she accepts a missive from a raven. Leliana, dancing with her blades. Leliana, smiling. Leliana, laughing. Leliana, praying.

"Jesus," she mumbled, pushing a hand through her hair. "You're a widow, Dara. Pull it together."

"I can't imagine what you possibly have to pull together. From what I can see, you're already in one piece."

At the familiar voice, Dara started and stumbled backwards over a rickety chair as Leliana emerged from the shadows and lowered her cowl before gingerly pulling off her gloves. She approached the table and laid her gloves carefully down next to the drawings.

"Leli..." Dara began, taking a deep breath to calm her racing heart. "I know you're the Spymaster, but must you sneak into my quarters? Have you ever considered just knocking?"

Leliana pulled her eyes from the drawings only for a moment to offer a coy smile. Dara's mouth went dry as cotton. "I must keep you on your toes, dear one." It was said without a smile, but Dara caught the hint of playful mirth in her tone.

"Yes, well, you failed at keeping me on my toes, but succeeded in knocking me on my ass." An attempt at levity as Dara tried to ignore the rising heat in her face. Leliana's nimble fingers had shuffled through the drawings until she was looking at the four or five Dara had done solely of her.

The Spymaster snorted. "Such a way with words, you have."

Dara wet her lips and shrugged. "Some people think so? Maybe you just haven't heard."

A rare giggle escaped the red head. "Hmmm, perhaps." Blue eyes met green. "I find these drawings of yours particularly telling."

"Those? Yes, well, if you weren't so..." _lovely, fascinating, divine, incredible_ , "er...interesting," Dara's cowardly mouth finished for her, "maybe I wouldn't sketch you."

The red head raised an eyebrow. She saw right through her. Dara held no illusions about that. But she could pretend. Feeling uncomfortable and no match for Leli with wit, Dara cleared her throat and took a more direct approach.

"Anyway, can I help you with something? Is there a particular reason that you decided to sneak into my room after dark and give me a heart attack?"

For a split second, Dara thought she saw a gleam in Leli's eye and then it was gone and she doubted she saw it at all. Then, the bard's face did something more unexpected, it softened and she looked at the floor, clearly uncomfortable.

"I wanted to...to apologize. I...I should not have spoken to you in the manner that I did. It was...unfair of me to call you a fool." Leli glanced up at Dara through long lashes. "I was...afraid. You have to understand, everyone whom I have...cared deeply for...I have lost. Marjolaine to betrayal and the game. The warden to the Archdemon." Her voice caught. "The Divine at Haven."

Dara stepped forward and reached for Leli's hand, cradling it as carefully in her own as a she might a frightened bird. Leliana's fingers folded hesitantly around Dara's, their eyes meeting again.

"I can't...I don't know if I could ...withstand such a loss again. My soul nearly broke with the loss of the Divine. You were able to bring me back from the brink in Valence. I can't lose you. My heart wouldn't survive it."

Dara's own heart ached at the open, vulnerability in Leliana's face. She wasn't seeing the Spymaster, or a bard, or the Left Hand of the Divine. She was seeing Leli. Dara thought her heart might burst with the warm rush of affection that overwhelmed her. When she spoke, she chose her words carefully.

"Leli, you have to understand something about me. You won't lose me to betrayal, or duty, or faith. My loyalties lay with those I love. I agreed to go to the Arbor Wilds with Ellana because she requested I go, and she is my friend. However, Ellana isn't you. And," Dara's heart sped up as she contemplated her next few words. "You...I...care very deeply for you, too. If you asked me to stay, I would stay." Wetting her lips and closing her eyes, Dara raised the bard's fair hand to her lips and brushed a feather light kiss across her knuckles.

In response, there was the softest intake of breath and then cool fingertips touching Dara's face and warm, soft lips pressed to the very corner of her mouth. Then, they were gone and she was being wrapped in an embrace that smelled of Andraste's grace. Warm air ghosted across the shell of Dara's ear.

"You're very sweet. Thank you. You're also very brave. Go. Just promise you'll come back to me."

Dara nodded into the embrace. "Promise."

"Good."


End file.
